Q. my son is 6 months, for a while i thought i didnt want anymore. however now in the past few weeks i have been thinking that loving another baby would be wonderful. im wondering if they are too close will the older revert back to being a baby and if they are too far apart will they fight alot?
what is your experience?
what is your experience?
Answer
I'm 38yrs and have a daughter who just turned 18yrs, a son who just turned 6yrs, an almost 5yr daughter and baby boy on the way with my husband of 18yrs. Both being close and far apart in age have their ups and downs and I don't find one better than the other, but I must say that my oldest is much closer and gets along better with my two little ones than my two little ones do with each other.
It was a lot easier to go from having one kid to two kids with my oldest being almost 12 years old. She was very helpful and loved to hold, feed, even change the baby. I was never one to go "Go do___" 24/7 because I understood from my childhood how I am the mother and not her. It was a little hard at times to constanly being bringing the baby, the stroller, the diaper bag etc to all my daughters soccer and lacrosse games, plays, dances etc, to have to get up in the middle of it or leave and miss my daughter because the baby wasn't comfortable. Little things like that.
There is a 14 month gap between my youngest and my middle and that was a challege. Two babies in diapers, two babies on bottles, two babies not sleeping etc all while still running around with my oldest.
Now that they're a little older, things are easier. My two little ones are into the same TV shows, activities, friends etc so it's very easy to entertain them both at the same time when we are home or go somewhere, while if I take all three of my kids somewhere it's a little hard to find something that caters to my oldest and the younger ones at the same time...for example...finding a resort to go to on vacation.
With my younger ones having a much older sister around, I noticed that theyre a little more social, mature and have better hand-eye coordination than other kids their age. My daughter does A LOT with them- teaching them to read, write, play sports, how to answer a phone, how to use the computer etc way before I thought they would be ready to do so.
We do have some issues though now and then at home. My oldest will have friends over and the other two will be pains in the neck. Our home is still "child friendly" with lots of little kid toys and games and I feel that my daughter feels kind of pushed out in a way. It's hard being a teenager in a preschool aged home.
What did bother me a little is the idea of sending my oldest daughter off to college and my youngest daughter to kindergarten next year. Not anymore with a little guy on the way. My oldest and him seems like they are a life time apart.
You're going to read a lot of stories about kids being a year apart, 5yrs apart, 10+ yrs apart both hating each other and loving each other. In my own personal opinion, I both love and hate that big gap between my oldest and my middle and the little one between my middle and my youngest. It really depends on your life style. Are you a very young mom and want to wait until you're a little older to have a 2nd child? Are you planning on having 3+ children? Will you mind having 2+ children who aren't going to be able to do things a lot of time on their own yet at the same time? Are you one of those people who go, "Ok, done with the diaper stage/preschool stage etc" and can't wait for them to grow up to enjoy them, or would you not mind having one child half way through elementary school while one has yet to start kindergarten? Are there things you want to do without your children in the future (traveling, activites etc) or are your children your main future and goal?
Think about these questions and I'm sure you'll come up with how close or far apart you want them soon. I think 2.5-4yrs is perfect. Either way, it'll be a good choice. Best wishes
I'm 38yrs and have a daughter who just turned 18yrs, a son who just turned 6yrs, an almost 5yr daughter and baby boy on the way with my husband of 18yrs. Both being close and far apart in age have their ups and downs and I don't find one better than the other, but I must say that my oldest is much closer and gets along better with my two little ones than my two little ones do with each other.
It was a lot easier to go from having one kid to two kids with my oldest being almost 12 years old. She was very helpful and loved to hold, feed, even change the baby. I was never one to go "Go do___" 24/7 because I understood from my childhood how I am the mother and not her. It was a little hard at times to constanly being bringing the baby, the stroller, the diaper bag etc to all my daughters soccer and lacrosse games, plays, dances etc, to have to get up in the middle of it or leave and miss my daughter because the baby wasn't comfortable. Little things like that.
There is a 14 month gap between my youngest and my middle and that was a challege. Two babies in diapers, two babies on bottles, two babies not sleeping etc all while still running around with my oldest.
Now that they're a little older, things are easier. My two little ones are into the same TV shows, activities, friends etc so it's very easy to entertain them both at the same time when we are home or go somewhere, while if I take all three of my kids somewhere it's a little hard to find something that caters to my oldest and the younger ones at the same time...for example...finding a resort to go to on vacation.
With my younger ones having a much older sister around, I noticed that theyre a little more social, mature and have better hand-eye coordination than other kids their age. My daughter does A LOT with them- teaching them to read, write, play sports, how to answer a phone, how to use the computer etc way before I thought they would be ready to do so.
We do have some issues though now and then at home. My oldest will have friends over and the other two will be pains in the neck. Our home is still "child friendly" with lots of little kid toys and games and I feel that my daughter feels kind of pushed out in a way. It's hard being a teenager in a preschool aged home.
What did bother me a little is the idea of sending my oldest daughter off to college and my youngest daughter to kindergarten next year. Not anymore with a little guy on the way. My oldest and him seems like they are a life time apart.
You're going to read a lot of stories about kids being a year apart, 5yrs apart, 10+ yrs apart both hating each other and loving each other. In my own personal opinion, I both love and hate that big gap between my oldest and my middle and the little one between my middle and my youngest. It really depends on your life style. Are you a very young mom and want to wait until you're a little older to have a 2nd child? Are you planning on having 3+ children? Will you mind having 2+ children who aren't going to be able to do things a lot of time on their own yet at the same time? Are you one of those people who go, "Ok, done with the diaper stage/preschool stage etc" and can't wait for them to grow up to enjoy them, or would you not mind having one child half way through elementary school while one has yet to start kindergarten? Are there things you want to do without your children in the future (traveling, activites etc) or are your children your main future and goal?
Think about these questions and I'm sure you'll come up with how close or far apart you want them soon. I think 2.5-4yrs is perfect. Either way, it'll be a good choice. Best wishes
Parents with children in ALL DAY preschool or daycare that require a pillow or blanket?
Q. What type of blanket and pillow do you take for your child? We were using the travel pillow and a small blanket from home but because it has to be washed every weekend the zipper on the pillow gave out. I was looking into purchasing a nap mat and wanted to know if anyone had purchased one and what your opinion was. They are terribly expensive and I would like have some input before investing in one.
Okay maybe I need to clarify- he already attends a preschool and takes naps daily. They take naps on cots that are washed down every weekend with a bleach solution. As a parent, we are required to bring a blanket and pillow from home and take these items home every weekend and wash them. The zipper on the pillow he had broke becasue the pillow is washed every weekend and instead of buying another small pillow (or in this case several since it seems like they are going to keep breaking) I thought about buying a nap mat or a bed roll that has a pillow attached to a blanket. I wanted to know if anyone had purchased one and what they thought. It has to be durable and able to be washed at least once a week.
Yes Jho-that is what I am talking about. I do not know anyone that can sew though!
Okay maybe I need to clarify- he already attends a preschool and takes naps daily. They take naps on cots that are washed down every weekend with a bleach solution. As a parent, we are required to bring a blanket and pillow from home and take these items home every weekend and wash them. The zipper on the pillow he had broke becasue the pillow is washed every weekend and instead of buying another small pillow (or in this case several since it seems like they are going to keep breaking) I thought about buying a nap mat or a bed roll that has a pillow attached to a blanket. I wanted to know if anyone had purchased one and what they thought. It has to be durable and able to be washed at least once a week.
Yes Jho-that is what I am talking about. I do not know anyone that can sew though!
Answer
i had to look up what you meant by "nap mat" i pictured one of those tumbling mats in a gym type things, lol (that's what i had growing up)
i don't have kids in a daycare, but my MIL quilted a "nap mat" for each of my girls. it doesn't have a zipper, but folds in on itself to make a pillow. i've seen similar products that fold into itself to make a backpack.
if you know anyone that quilts/sews they could make you one.
but target and toys r us both have some for $20
http://www.target.com/s/175-4332093-7278234?_encoding=UTF8&search-alias=tgt-index&keywords=nap%20mat&searchSize=30&ref=sr_bx%5F1%5F1&searchView=grid5&searchNodeID=1038576&searchPage=1&searchRank=target104545
http://www.toysrus.com/search/index.jsp?kwCatId=&kw=nap%20mat&origkw=nap%20mat&f=Taxonomy/TRUS/2254197&sr=1
and walmart has some for $40
http://www.walmart.com/search/search-ng.do?search_constraint=0&ic=48_0&search_query=nap+mat
i had to look up what you meant by "nap mat" i pictured one of those tumbling mats in a gym type things, lol (that's what i had growing up)
i don't have kids in a daycare, but my MIL quilted a "nap mat" for each of my girls. it doesn't have a zipper, but folds in on itself to make a pillow. i've seen similar products that fold into itself to make a backpack.
if you know anyone that quilts/sews they could make you one.
but target and toys r us both have some for $20
http://www.target.com/s/175-4332093-7278234?_encoding=UTF8&search-alias=tgt-index&keywords=nap%20mat&searchSize=30&ref=sr_bx%5F1%5F1&searchView=grid5&searchNodeID=1038576&searchPage=1&searchRank=target104545
http://www.toysrus.com/search/index.jsp?kwCatId=&kw=nap%20mat&origkw=nap%20mat&f=Taxonomy/TRUS/2254197&sr=1
and walmart has some for $40
http://www.walmart.com/search/search-ng.do?search_constraint=0&ic=48_0&search_query=nap+mat
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